First, let’s get Freedom of Speech and the Chick-fil-a fiasco out of the way. Freedom of Speech does not mean that there are not consequences for what you say. People can boycott your company, fire you, or end a relationship based on what you say. You have freedom to say what you want. Others have freedom to respond. Freedom of Speech means that you won’t be arrested or charged with a crime for sharing your opinion, as long as it’s not a threat, slander or libel. Secondly, there is a big difference in what you stand for and what you practice. Dan Cathy stated that he and his company are for traditional models of marriage, and that they even give money to some organizations that hold similar views. That doesn’t mean that Chick-fil-a doesn’t hire or serve gay people. That’s an entirely different discussion. I am not for DUIs, shop-lifting, or drug abuse. Our church is not for those behaviors. But, people with DUIs, shop-lifters and drug abusers are welcome in our doors. I’ve even been to visit a few of those folks with those struggles in prison. Dan Cathy has a right to be for whatever he wishes. People also have the right to support or boycott a company because of the owner’s beliefs. We are free to do so. We all have a right to support, boycott or ignore his beliefs and/or company because of that. I’d die for Cathey’s right to say what he said. I’d die for the right that some exercised in eating at Chick-fil-a on Aug. 1. And I’d die for the rights of those that want to boycott CFA and organized gay ‘kiss-ins.’ Thirdly, those government officials that boldly announced that Chick-fil-a would not be given permits because of Dan Cathy’s remarks were treading on dangerous ground. Do you really want government officials granting permits for commerce based on their own personal ideological and/or religious beliefs? I didn’t think so. Wisely, their City Councils and governing bodies have sense issued statements that all companies that fall under certain guidelines (which Chick-fil-a most certainly does) will be issued permits. Okay, that’s enough of the legalities. It’s just frustrated me that people are so passionate about this that they haven’t been able to see these plain facts about freedom and rights.
The passion revealed in the events of Chick-fil-a’s Boycott, Appreciation Day and Kiss-In reveals the complexity of the issue. Full disclosure, I’m an Ordained Elder in the United Methodist Church and Lead Pastor of an evangelical, rock-n-roll church. However, I went to what I would call a liberal college and seminary at the University of Georgia and Candler School of Theology at Emory University. I was forced to face this issue and formulate my own opinions about it. And it’s messy.
Some Christians felt called to attend Chilck-fil-a Appreciation Day – for whatever reason. Thousands showed support of the company and solidarity for traditional family values. Many saw this as a slap in the face to the gay community. Some saw it as an act of defiance against the gay marriage movement and just another example of how the Church is more about causes than about people. Some said it was a shame that many Christians couldn’t gather to support the homeless and poor. Those assertions are a little over the top. Going to Chick-fil-a for CFA Appreciation Day didn’t make you a bad person. Did some people go with hateful intentions? I’d imagine so, and that’s a shame. I’ll bet most Christians that went did so to support a company that stands for the values they stand for. I’ll bet most Christians that went did so because they believe in something bigger than themselves. And I’ll bet a lot of them have gay friends and relatives – and love them. Moreover, where I come from, Christians get together all the time to help the homeless and the poor. No one does more for the homeless and poor in my community than the churches. Ultimately, what we saw was one side of the coin. There are some Christian Americans that oppose gay marriage because they fear what it will mean for our country. They don’t believe that homosexuality is supported in Scripture, and they believe that our country will be better off with some semblance of Biblical values in our law. Most of the people that I know that think this way do not hate gay people. They simply believe this is what’s best for our country. They want us to have laws that reflect a reverence for Biblical values.
There are many other dedicated followers of Christ on the other side who were hurt by what they saw at CFA Appreciation Day. They saw it as a failure of the Church and Christians everywhere. They want to open doors of communication and dialogue with the gay community instead of standing in judgment. They wanted nothing to do with the day. They have stood on the front lines of the battle to reach the gay community with the Gospel, and they saw it sabotage much of that work. They would argue that gay marriage is a civil rights issue. They would tell you that to open the door for the Gospel in the gay community, that the Church must support their basic rights. These Christians are for gay marriage because they see it as being for gay people, and God is for gay people (because God is for all people). That doesn’t mean that they condone the homosexual lifestyle, but they affirm them as humans and fellow Americans. These faithful Christians hold a traditional, Biblical view of homosexuality as outside of God’s will, but they see the social debate about gay marriage and rights as a totally separate issue. You can be for people’s freedom in America and not be for them acting on it. I think you should be free to have an affair and not be arrested for it. I don’t think you should do it. These committed Christians would say that you can’t legislate morality and the government has no business telling you who you can marry.
Do you see how complicated it is? Do you see how committed Christians who read the same Bible and believe it says the same thing can come to different conclusions for how that plays out in government and the real world? That’s not it.
Then, there are other Christians who simply see this as a mistake that the Church has made for centuries. They reject traditional teaching about homosexuality and claim that the Bible was not talking about the kind of homosexual relationships we see today. They affirm the gay lifestyle and fight for freedom for gays not only in civil life but also church life. They want churches and denominations to accept homosexual behavior as normal as heterosexual behavior. They love Jesus, and they want the Church to marry gay people and ordain practicing homosexuals. They believe the Church is behind the times. Simply, they reject the idea that God considers homosexuality is a sin. They would equate this to the civil rights issues of the 60’s, saying that eventually the Church must progress to understand the culture better.
If I’m honest, I struggle finding my place in there. I, personally, cannot get over the Scriptures about homosexuality. To me, it seems clear that Scripture identifies homosexuality as a sin. I cannot ignore 2,000 years of Church history and tradition. I cannot stray from what has been considered orthodox Christianity for a lot longer than I’ve been around. I cannot turn a blind eye to the fact that every mainline denomination that has embraced homosexuality and non-orthodox theology has hemorrhaged members and shrunk rapidly in attendance while the fastest growing churches in America have embraced orthodox theology and evangelical thinking on this issue. I simply don’t believe that’s a coincidence. If you believe otherwise, you and I will have to agree to disagree about the Bible, what it says, and its authority. Perhaps we can have that discussion another time. However, our church is rooted in love. One of our Core Values is “Honor”, because we believe in honoring people as children of God, especially those whom the Church has dishonored in the past. We have always had seasons in which gay people attended our church regularly, and they’ve been welcomed into the community of faith. Though I feel very strongly about this Biblical stance in homosexuality, I’m not sure I want our government telling us who we can marry. I want to be known as a friend to gay people because I want to be known as a friend to all, so shouldn’t I be for gay marriage as a Christian who wants to open doors of love and acceptance to the gay community? On the other hand, I wonder what it will mean for our country if we continue down a path that does not honor God and His Word. Honestly, I’m not exactly sure what’s right. It’s complicated. So complicated that I don’t always know how to feel about it. It is possible for your spiritual and social thoughts on the issue to be completely at odds with each other. I do know that the Bible lifts up freedom. It was God’s first gift to humanity. I think God is pleased when we choose to follow His ways much more than when we are forced to. Of course, I suppose He’s pleased when nations choose to do the same. I’m very comfortable with the statement on human sexuality held by my denomination, the United Methodist Church, which I believe is filled with both grace, honor, and truth:
"We affirm that all persons are individuals of sacred worth, created in the image of God. All persons need the ministry of the Church in their struggles for human fulfillment, as well as the spiritual and emotional care of a fellowship that enables reconciling relationships with God, with others, and with self. The United Methodist Church does not condone the practice of homosexuality and consider this practice incompatible with Christian teaching. We affirm that God’s grace is available to all. We will seek to live together in Christian community, welcoming, forgiving, and loving one another, as Christ has loved and accepted us. We implore families and churches not to reject or condemn lesbian and gay members and friends. We commit ourselves to be in ministry for and with all persons."
I’m biased, but I think that’s pretty beautiful. This is a sin, but we love you, and everyone is welcome. Now, when it comes to gay marriage…you see the complications arise. The UMC officially supports laws that define marriage as being between a man and a woman. However, we are also officially for basic civil rights, including contractual relationships for the purposes of shared resources, guardian relationships, etc, regardless of sexual orientation. See there. It’s complicated.
Here’s the real issue as to why this is such a difficult issue. Every other sinner walks through the doors of the Church looking for forgiveness from their sins; the homosexual comes through the doors looking for affirmation for their sins. Divorce, substance abuse, lying, stealing, gossiping, hate – it’s all wrong. I’ve never had anyone try to tell me they weren’t. We take the Bible for what it says. We believe there is forgiveness available for all, no matter how far away we sometimes seem. The homosexual person comes not believing that what they are doing is sin. And if it’s not sin, then they don’t need or want forgiveness for it. I believe God’s love is free and available to all. Jesus died for gay and straight people. People are just people to God. His grace and forgiveness are available to all. Anyone that would repent of their sin is welcome to receive that grace. And that’s the issue, for me, that makes homosexuality like no other issue. Repentance. Salvation requires repentance. The Greek word for repentance is ‘metanoia’. It means a shift in thinking, a change of mind. In short, our minds change about our sin. It’s not that you immediately stop all the behaviors that were part of your life before you came to Christ; it’s that you now think differently about them. What if you simply don’t repent of that sin? Now, we’ve all got sin that we don’t even know is sin that we trust his grace to cover. However, it’s another thing to throw in God’s face that you simply don’t believe what He says about it and as Christ offers his grace over that area of your life, the answer is, “No, thank you. No grace needed here.” Can we be saved from all our sins if there are sins we refuse to repent of? Certainly, there are many gay Christians. I’ve known many. I had a friend in college who struggled with it. He believed he was gay, but he also believed God’s Word. He wanted to find another way. He had repented, and still struggled with temptation and sin. Every. Christian. Still. Struggles. It doesn’t matter which sin it is. But, what if your thinking doesn’t change? I don’t get to make those decisions. I’m glad God is in charge, and I’m focusing on doing all I can to align my life with God’s Word. That’s keeps me busy enough.
Yet, I am a spiritual leader, and I live in a tension of trying to figure out ways to reach out to the gay community, or simply, any gay person that attends our church on a given Sunday. How do I love them? I want to. I want them to feel welcomed in my church and my home. When I hear, “Aren’t we supposed to just love everyone?” I sometimes feel that’s code for accept all behaviors. But I can’t. I can accept you as a person, but I can’t accept the choices that I’m convicted our outside God’s purpose for you. I love alcoholics, but I want them to be free from that sin because I think it’s destructive. I love greedy people, but I want them to be free from that because I think it’s destructive. I love gay people, but I want them to be free from that because I think it’s destructive. No other group pushes back. Greedy people justify their greed, but deep down they know it’s wrong. Alcoholics know it’s wrong. Liars know it’s wrong. Homosexuals want me to tell them that it’s not wrong, and I can’t. I love them, but I’m not sure how to show that love in a way that will feel like love to them. Jesus told the sinful woman, “Neither do I condemn you. Now go, and sin no more.” The gay community wants the Church to say, “Neither do we condemn you. Now go, and don’t worry it’s not really sin anyway.” We can’t make that leap, and that leaves a gap between the issue of homosexuality and the Church that I’m not exactly sure how to bridge. I want them to feel loved in the Church. I so desperately want them to know Jesus. But I want them to change, not because I’m worried about where our country is headed -- because I’m worried about where they’re headed. Yet, I want them to choose that for themselves. I’m not sure our government should. I think. But then sometimes I don’t know how the government should respond…because it’s complicated.
5 comments:
I feel your struggle Carter. Very well written and you expressed yourself honestly and beautifully.
It IS complicated.
I guess I don't get the logic that, denying the same rights I enjoy to a community of people just because they are different than me, somehow makes this country worse off. If so, we'd have a super great country if we denyed civil rights to even more and more people; as long as they are not like me.
It's really none of my buisness what anyone does. It's between them and God. It would be interesting if the church expended as much energy on other, in my opinion, more universal sins, as it does on homosexuality. Some of them are complicated as well.
Thanks, Tonya.
Tom, I agree. That's kind of the focus of one of my messages in the next series. We need to focus on the plank in our own eyes. Yet, the Church has to have a loving voice, too, about all issues. You know, it's complicated.
Love the sinner. Hate your OWN sin. (copied).
I agree, Anon. We're doing a series starting Sept. 16 called "What Went Wrong?" on the brokenness in American Christianity and how we can fix it. One of the Sundays is going to be focused on "We singled out a few 'big sins' and ignored our own." Of course, there are no 'big sins', but we've deemed them that way, and that's part of the problem. Anyway, our focus needs to be on ourselves.
However, the complicated part of that is that the Church and Christian leaders are called to call people to repentance, too. For me, it's not complex to love the sinner -- it's what love looks like. My best friends that I know love me for who I am also have my permission to say, "Hey, you've really got this wrong and this is out of whack in your life. You need to repent and get back in line with God. I love you too much not to tell you that." Hopefully, we all have friends that can do that. Part of my job is to be that kind of voice from the stage. Simply, I'm called to point people to Jesus and show them a better way because I love people too much to not tell them that.
And that makes it a challenge on this issue because I feel like no matter how I or the Church shows love, there is a gap in mindsets that's very hard to bridge. I want to bridge that gap and I'm still on the journey to figure out how the Church can be genuine and faithful at the same time. I believe some of the answer is in serving. We can serve all people and we can serve the community with all people. That's why we're all still on the journey...
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